Life Skills Specific

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Being Sensitive – in an Insensitive World – Part 2

All your life you thought something was wrong with you.  You were uncomfortable around noise.  No one understood your need to be alone.  You seem to know things without being told.  The good news is that you are not dysfunctional.  You are (again I repeat) a Highly Sensitive Person.  You are not the only one; you share this trait with a small minority of the population who are referred to as shy or timid.

•             Overwhelming Stimuli: HSPs respond strongly to external stimuli and become exhausted from taking in and processing these stimuli.  They are born with a nervous system that may see, hear, smell or feel more than others.  As adults, they may also think, reflect or notice more than others.  The processing is largely unconscious or body-conscious.  HSPs grow up feeling flawed, especially when loud music, crowds of people or simply a busy day stresses them. At such times, they need quiet time alone to recover.

•             Childhood: Problems can begin in childhood if their sensitivities are not recognized.  They can experience deep trauma, even in the womb if they were not wanted.  Highly sensitive babies are more peaceful when alone.  Certain people terrify them; toy mobiles upset them, rocking irritates them and changes in weather make them restless.  They may be colicky and their digestive systems may not tolerate food that is too hot or too cold.  If the needs of the baby are ignored the child becomes insecure. Sensitive babies are also very creative and aware.  They may walk early or smile a lot.  As infants and toddlers they may experience sensory overload from the newness of things.  When old enough, they spend time alone to regain their balance and energy.

What works and what doesn’t

This hyper-awareness to their environment makes HSPs cautious.  Any kind of change can be difficult.  They are not known for their rash actions.  They foresee the consequences of words and actions.  HSPs can feel happy in their hearts on a joyous occasion but are unable to express it.  They are seen as inhibited or unsociable.  They do not like social situations and prefer having deep intimate conversations with someone one on one.

Rather than forcing themselves to fit in and be more outgoing, HSPs need to learn to appreciate their sensitivity in less stimulating ways Developing boundaries for safety and comfort becomes important.  If they are sensitive to bright fluorescent lights, chemical odors or certain kinds of people, HSPs need to use their creativity to find ways to avoid such stimuli.

HSPs often try to hide themselves.  They rarely appreciate that many other people also have these same traits.  Sharing quiet meals and talking about spiritual matters can become intimacy heaven.  Accepting that they really do enjoy long walks in nature, rather than tennis matches, alleviates stress.

Relationships

A sensitive person’s ability to pick up subtle cues and ambivalence in the unconscious processes of the other person can affect communication in relationships.  Even though they can tune into what is going on, they either can’t say it or they blurt out a negative judgment.  At these times, they are acting out their own past experiences of being humiliated for their sensitivities.  The way out of this dilemma is to become more conscious of their habitual reactions and to take more time out to be alone.  They need partners to accept this strategy.  They may require and entire night’s sleep to be clear enough to express how they feel about an issue.

Intimacy

HSPs appreciate intimacy.   They actually prefer talking about their feelings and spirituality but often believe no one else is interested. An open and sharing relationship, preferably with another HSP –can be of great benefit in providing awareness of what does and doesn’t work.  This applies to both the spiritual-social areas and the physical body. Entertainment and excitement is not what holds a sensitive relationship together.  HSPs are more interested in deepening their self-awareness and some never become bored of listening to their partner’s dreams.  A sensitive partner will notice changes in the other’s mood or behavior.

Food and Diet

HSPs are very sensitive to food and physical environments. Food needs to be looked at from a different viewpoint than what is promoted by national food guides.  Not all foods are going to be equally tolerated by their body.  Stimulating substances such as alcohol, coffee, sugar and junk food can be highly toxic to an HSP.  Diets need to be tailor-made and regularly modified. There are no right diets that sensitive people can follow permanently.  Their level of sensitivity is anything but static and rigid.  It requires a change in attitude to accept the fascinating refinement process continually being experienced by their body/mind/spirit.  Generally – simple, frequent meals work best.

Spirituality

Once HSPs stop trying to become strong and rough extroverts, they often develop a keen interest in and gratitude for their consciousness, which takes them into unexplored realms.  These complex inner realms, largely avoided by others, become their individuated paths to wholeness and happiness.

Other

HSPs might also be extremely sensitive to fabric, lotions, soaps and detergents, smells, etc. …..

Now… a HSP person may have all, some or one of the characteristics…. There are no rules or easily defined explanations…. If you are a sensitive… then… accept it and discover the actual wonderfulness of being one….

I really do think, however… that some HSPs can drink caffeine…. Yes?????  Well…. Yes!!!!!

1 thought on “SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Being Sensitive – in an Insensitive World – Part 2”

  1. I loved your blog… I fit in ALL what you said.. even for the coffee… you should precise that we wouldn’t accept just some coffee… it has to be the royal one :):)
    Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I am so happy i put you on my journey to remind me that it’s all ok… i can carry on with this life…
    Would you explain WHY ON EARTH did we choose to be here, except for the unconditional love we have ?
    With love and blessings your way,
    Nicole

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