Life in General Life Skills

Sitting with your emotions/feelings… a chore sometimes…huh?

Our emotions/feelings color our lives with varying palettes.  Sometimes we feel a strong emotion/feeling in reaction to something that has happened, but emotions/feelings also visit us seemingly out of the blue, flooding us unexpectedly with joy or grief or melancholy.  Like the weather, they come and go, influencing our mental state with their particular vibration.  Sometimes a difficult emotion/feeling hangs around longer than we would like and we begin to wonder when it will release its hold on us.  This is often true of grief stemming from loss, for example or lingering anger over a past event.

Usually, if we allow ourselves to feel our emotions fully when they come up, they recede naturally, giving way to another and another.  When an emotion haunts us, it is often because we are afraid of really feeling it.  Emotions like despair and rage are powerful and it is natural to want to hold them at bay or deny them.  Certainly, we don’t want to let them take us over so that we say or do things we later regret.  When we are facing this kind of situation, it can be helpful to ask the spirit, “How long do I need to sit with these emotions, how long do I need to feel these emotions before they can pass?”  If you ask sincerely and wait, an answer will come.  Setting time limits on your difficult emotions may be just the technique you need to face it fully.  If you deny emotions, they will come up and up and up again…  I usually tell people to just fully engage in that emotion or feeling or whatever you call it… if you are full of rage… then go throw some rocks… if you are feeling depressed… then really “feel” it… whine, bawl, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa….  Trust me – both get boring and release is imminent.

When you have a sense of how much time you need to spend, perhaps, set a timer.  Sit down and make yourself available to the emotion/feeling that is nagging you.  All you have to do is to “feel” it.  Avoid getting attached to it or rejecting it.  Simply let it ebb and flow within you.  Emotions are by their nature cyclical, so you can trust that just as one reaches its apex – it will pass.  Each time you sit with its presence without either repressing, you will find that — that difficult emotion was the catalyst for much needed emotional healing.

If you have any good ideas for “feeling” your emotions… let me know ( and I will share them in a future blog…

So I “feel” I need some coffee… how about you?

1 thought on “Sitting with your emotions/feelings… a chore sometimes…huh?”

  1. I’ve been thinking someone should invent “Feel Your Feelings Again 101” for all of us who spent years (or decades!) stuffing our feelings, and are now attempting to learn how to feel them again!

    It’s hard to tell more specifically than that something is present that doesn’t feel great … but what to do from there?!? Any tips any of your readers have would be helpful to see. Thanks for the great topic .. & enjoy your coffee!!

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