General Life Skills

Whining….If you aren’t part of the solution, perhaps…………….

Have you ever had days where everything comes at you at once?  There seems to be more problems not only going on with you personally, but problems all around you.  So… what to do, what to do????

What I’m saying today is that we are either part of the solution or we’re part of the problem. 

So what are you?  I have been asked and have asked that question many times in my life, both as a boss and an employee…. As a wife, mom, friend, etc….. Looking back at different times in my life, I have actually been both….

I have found out that in order to whine or complain about something I need to:

  • Know what I am complaining about and have the background about it (in other words, so some research… no hear-say)
  • Determine if my perception of the issue is accurate or merely an emotional response (sometimes hard to)
  • Is the issue actually my problem?
  • What are my options when it comes to this issue?
  • What probably would happen if I do not implement or follow what I am complaining about?
  • What probably will happen if I do implement or follow what I am complaining about?
  • What are the possible worst and best case scenario(s) for the above two questions?
  • Will my actions have any immediate positive or negative affects?
  • Will my actions have any long-term positive or negative affects?
  • Determine the level that any potential change would occur (personal, local, regional, etc.)
  • Think about what my solutions to the problem would be, is it any better than what I am complaining about? (Hmmmmmmm) Is it realistic? What are the steps that would be involved in implementing my solution?
  • Would my efforts realistically change anything for the better or am I simply tilting at windmills? (I have been known to do this).

If after I go through this decision-type process, If I can see that the problem is not going to be solved at my level or any level that I can influence, then continuing to whine and complain about it serves no purpose other than to stress me out, so I “get” to

  • Change my perception of what I consider a problem
  • Let it become someone else’s problem (passing the buck)
  • Let it go and move on – make the best of the hand I have been dealt.

I know it really isn’t that simple, but it does help me get through my whining process.  Sometimes it feels good to whine…, but sometimes we need to just stop it… the negativity derived from it not only hurts us, but the folks around us…  so— are you part of the problem or the solution?

Today, I am the solution…. I’m off to go find some freshly brewed coffee…. It solves the problem of me needing a “jolt” …. and some comforting warm liquid slithering down my throat… yum!

2 thoughts on “Whining….If you aren’t part of the solution, perhaps…………….”

  1. Wow–this was a great one–not just a good one–a GREAT one. I have been working on not doing as much whining lately but I did not yet have a “process”–I do believe I will print this off so I can have it handy–maybe even make multiple copies so I can hand it off to some of the people who reside with me and love to whine–hmmm. You are wonderful!!! Happy Wednesday!

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